THE NAKED CITY: MEATING LADY GA GA!

MEATING LADY GA GA!

It must be hard being Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta or Lady Ga Ga as she is better known to her millions of doting fans all around the world. As an artist who readily admits that her greatest achievement is the art of fame itself the constant reinvention and endless costume changes must be taking its toll. In Sydney this week to participate in an invite only piece of corporate hoopla at the Sydney Town Hall we managed to score an exclusive interview whilst Ga Ga was inspecting dinosaur eggs at the Australian Museum. The questions went something like this:

Naked City: Have you seen anything here that takes your fancy?

Lady Ga Ga: There’s a pteredactyl head over there that would make a great hat.

Naked City: Are you planning to wear anything distinctively Australian at your showcase Sydney performance?

Lady Gag Gag: It’s basically a surprise but I have had a tonne of road kill shipped in from the Nullarbor. There’s bound to be something freaky there.

Naked City: Your choice of the Sydney Town Hall is interesting. Did the fact that it’s now been earthquake proofed attract you to it?

Lady Ga Ga: Not really – it’s just across the road from Woolies Cafeteria and that’s a great choice for the after party.

Naked City: Will you be wearing a meat dress whilst you are in Sydney?

Lady Ga Ga: Look closely darling – the dress I am wearing now is made up of ten thousand pieces of hand sliced cabanossi, lovingly assembled by a group of peasant women in  the Ukraine. I want all my Sydney fans to turn out in their favourite meat suit. I will also be surfing Bondi in an all salami bikini. Processed meat is the look this year in case you didn’t know.

Naked City: You are renowned for your famous entrances at your live shows. Do you have anything planned for your Town Hall audience?

Lady Ga Ga: I’ll be arriving on the 8.45pm train from Blacktown, jumping the turnstyles to create a bit of controversy, and pursued up the Town Hall steps by a bunch of your burly RailCorp transit officers.

Naked City: We know it’s an invite only show but are there any Aussie celebrities you would really like to see at the gig?

Lady Ga Ga: Derryn Hinch would be cool – his old liver would make a great handbag. Judy Moran would be an asset for my backstage security. Are Grong Grong still gigging? I love the guy who flogs the Magic Mop on your morning TV. Is the Little Pebble still locked up?

Naked City: Well thanks for chatting with us and good luck with your show at The Sydney Monster Hall.

Lady Ga Ga: Thanks but your name won’t be on the door!